I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
