Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
