am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
