i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
