i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
