You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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