I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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