i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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