For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
