I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
