well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
