Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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