did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
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