In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
