when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
