well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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