if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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