I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
