I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize