I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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