I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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