There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
