I'd wear matching sweaters with you
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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