id be glad to
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
