just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
