I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
