whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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