office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
he's single and there are thong briefs.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
