dude i'm inner monologue high
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
