I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
