Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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