morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize