No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Randomize
