I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Even my vagina gasped.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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