Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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