grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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