I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
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