I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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