i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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