well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I would ride that face into the sunset
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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