So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
