Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
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