i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
