Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
