erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
