just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
