I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
