I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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