She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
