I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
