my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
